Ok well, 7 years ago when i was 14 my dad died, it was bad obviously, went to counselling and everything, got help done
now, im at uni and have an amazing bf,
Recently my brother told me my dad killed himself and i feel completly lost
i have trust issues with my bf, i completely worry if hes out or if hes late coming up my house because i think something has happend to him or hes with someone else or lying to me. He told me that he understands, but say i need to stop comparing him too my dad, i realise i do compare him, the feelings of love i have for him, i feel if i lost him then i would feel the same pain. i sometimes in my mind have thought " if i was sick then he would show how much he loved me" which is crazy because i know he does.
I feel totally F*cked up just now