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Deadly_kizz's Blog

Creation Date: 03-30-2008 06:22 AM

The Effects of 'Him'

I Just Split With My Boyfriend of just over a year.
He was controlling. It felt like he was watching me 24/7 i was scared to hug my boy mates in college for pitty sake (he does'nt go to my college).
I had no time as he saw me most week days and i stayed at his every weekend.
But the thing is i didnt want to say anything as i was scared of his reaction.

Now we have split up i have sooo much ...


Can Anyone Tell Me What These Dreams Mean?

I keep having dreams about two of my exs they differ from eachother depending who it is im dreaming about, so theres 'S' and 'A'.

I drempt of 'S' last night: He was drinving a car i think it was a black mercadess, we was arguing but i dont remember what about. So he pulls over comes round to my side of the car, opens then door, knels down and then says he sorry, tells me he loves me and hugs m...


oh and.....

In a bad mood woke up at 5:30 am and cant get back to sleep!!!!! its now almost 8am now i have a serious migrain and its killing me ive hade about 4 hours sleep and going up london soon.

Looks like im gana be living on redball/coffee all day .


Amazing!!!! .

I never been a huge fan of the dentist (who has right)
but ive hade to go hospital for my teeth (im scared of hospitals to)
one of my adults hasnt come through and i went to have an ex-ray to see whats going on
turns out its grow backwards into the roof of my mouth
now i need an operation to get it out and i need braces for 3 years
great brace face at ...


Fresh Start Maybe?

Hahahaha ive looked back through my old blogs and have come to the conclusion that my life is F***ed.

To much drama i would love to just wipe the slate clean and start over but im wondering if that will be a bad idea .... ill be leaving so much behind. Not to mention my mum would be soooo mad at me. Oh and the controlling ex why im at it.

Maybe ill just wait till im 18 and pass my driving ...



I hate it here, my life seems pointless at the moment.
I cant walk through my college in peace because of a certain PERSON.
I am seriously considering moving away. Ive got a few friends up north(liverpool) and they wouldnt mind a room mate. But i cant leave my bff charlotte.

Thank you charlotte youve been my rock i love you loads hunny after all this time your like my only true friend.

I ...


You Call That A Best Friend.....

Ive kicked out my now EX best friend from my life ...... lets call her 'H'

Hmmm where do i start.....

Well 'H' lies i know that but it has become rediculous. We planned to go shopping then her mum would pick us up then go back to her with lots of food and chick flicks.
We went shopping and she told me her mum was going to pick us up from a certain train station at half 11. So we went sho...



I havnt been on here for a while.

I just looked at my last blog :S ... its pretty bad.

Just feeling a bit down, been thinking a little to much.

I'm terrified because i find out if i get a place on the next level of my course next monday and i dont think i will get in because of my attendence .

So yes im just worrying and thinking and hoping .

Stay Safe x



I have 4 cans of cyder yay (im a light weight) ive been cryin for the last 2 hours ive got throught 1 and a half and im already feeling it . I wana get so drunk i cant feel this pain it hurts :'(.

I hate college, i wana go back to heathcote (secondry school) everything was so great there :'(, i miss it so much.

I cant even read the screen properly but i bo were ll the keys on the keyb...


the distance...

i havnt seen shaun 4 2 weeks
(i was in france last week though)
is this even a relationship
45 mintunes on the train to see him
i allways go see him
msn convos are struggle to keep going
he hardly ever txts back even with credit
he was txtin me all week in france sayin hw i suld hurry up and cum home cuz he misses me
got back saturday and he still anit ca