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miaddiction
06-26-2008, 02:21 AM
used to like binges at one point. and look forward to them an never really dread purging or worry it doesnt happen etc.

whereas for the past few months ive been in complete fear and dread and panic over bingeing and purging. i get so stressed and feel so terrified i just cant see sense i get all light headed and shaky and loose my legs like theyr not attached.

im in a mess now got to purge a lot and really am tired but its a matter of must all the time.
i hate it :'(

i wish i cud hold onto my mum forever and never have to let her go.

also my stomachs been playing up loads lately. feeling sick all the time and horrifc heartburn and indigestion.

feel so fed up. and i dont get constipated lately, been the other way on. as if ive had some kind of stomach upset.

i dont knw wats happening to me anymore.

i must get this purging over then i can sort myself and the house out which is a mess and hopefully relax later

help :'( i feel so isolated its unreal i cant think straight

KendraLace
06-26-2008, 01:32 PM
I know what you mean.
I used to kind of like doing it.
It made me feel better to know I could control when they happened and stuff.
But now I can't and I'm so scared of eating anything.